Summer is approaching and our complexes are resurfacing.
“I don’t like my nose”, “I don’t like my legs”, “I don’t like my hair”, “I don’t like my figure”. The reasons for body dissatisfaction are as numerous as our body parts and our demands on them.
Few people are fully and definitively happy with their bodies. The degree of dissatisfaction, and especially the suffering associated with it, varies from person to person. While some complexes are moderate and acceptable, others can be extremely violent and unbearable. While minor complexes are commonplace and benign, more serious ones can become pathological, obsessive, distressing and even disabling on a daily basis. The exaggerated or false conviction of a major physical disgrace then becomes invasive and very painful.
The representation we have of our bodies is not an easy one. It’s the result of a complex and intimate blend of our visual perception (which is inevitably biased), our conscious and unconscious imagination, and what we project in the eyes of others, because our bodies are constantly on display.
Many complex and subtle emotions can be associated with this representation. These emotions can be positive (satisfaction, pride, pleasure, etc.), but also frequently negative towards oneself, with varying degrees of embarrassment or shame.
Judgment of one’s own body is never objective, nor based on purely aesthetic criteria. It is nourished by all our intimate emotions, our personal history, and the esteem we hold for ourselves and have received, or not, from others. The social and cultural environment also plays an important role, particularly today when image and physical appearance are so highly valued.
One of the most common reasons for dissatisfaction is weight and body shape. Feeling “too fat” or “too big” is a common feeling that many people have experienced. More rarely, some find themselves too thin, or at least not muscular enough, a complaint increasingly common among boys and men.
All degrees of concern are possible. Dissatisfaction becomes abnormal when it lasts over time, disturbs the mind, causes painful feelings, and alters certain behaviors: not being able to dress as you’d like, avoiding certain activities (swimming, sports, going out, etc.), or excessively modifying your diet.
For long-term changes, first ask yourself about the root causes of your complexes.
The first essential step is to make peace with your body. To do this, look at it holistically, without focusing on a single part or aspect. Rather than constantly zooming in on the perceived defect to monitor or compare it, “zoom out” and accept yourself in its entirety as you are. It’s not a question of trying to forget the detail that worries you, but of integrating it into a larger whole, your own person, with all the qualities you can attribute to yourself. Reclaim your body and feel good about it. Depending on what you like and are able to do (walking, running, dancing), your body can become a source of pleasure and self-confidence. This awareness and positive encounter can gradually replace obsession with your supposed defects.
I wish you a wonderful summer!
Take care of yourself ☺️
